Tuesday, November 17, 2009

We try not to think about it .

After an hour of reading aloud and explaining certain passages I decided to call it a day when Pugazh a frail ,dark and totally blind young man in early twenties felt his braille watch and said meekly ''M'am the time you have allotted for us is 1 hour and it isn't over ,there is still 10 minutes left''.

At this I said ''it is not possible to start a new lesson and finish it within 10 minutes''.to this he replied ''I want to ask you a few questions '' and proceeded to do so without waiting for my reply.and asked ''what did you feel the first time you saw us?''

I was taken aback by the directness of the question but nevertheless decided to answere honestly. I replied that it was one of my childhood terrors to lose my eyesight and to blunder around helplessly.That whenever I saw a blind person on the street I would look at them curiously feel a pang of pity and then move away forgetting them in the daily business of life.And that2 years back when I came in close contact with people with visual impairment I was over whelmed by pity and felt sorrowful and wondered at the cruel sadism of the creator in creating people with such disabilities.And that this sadness slowly evaporated when I found that whilst I pitied their plight they didnot pity themselves ,they moved around confidently and were just like any other youth interested in cricket, movie stars and politics! They heard me out quietly,

Then I asked Pughaz a thought tormenting me for the past 2 years since I actually started reading to them but never had the heart to talk about it or clear my doubts openly ,whether he felt sad and enraged at what fate had handed out to him?

He and another youth replied ''very rarely,that to only when people are discourteous ,like those waiting at the bus stand who donot tell us the bus numbers or when a conductor is rude or when my scribe shortens my answeres in exams''.

Once again I was taken aback These insults and slights are also common among the sighted. This is not inherent to their disability.At times when I take a bus and when I take time to board the public transport vehicle with its steep steps the conductor's' have yelled at me for being slow and some of them have rudely adviced me to take an auto.

So I pressed on and asked ''don't you miss seeing the sun,sky,moon,stars,leaves,your face in the mirror or your mother's or some girl's or watching T.V or films''? At which surprisingly all of them answered in unison ''No''.I could'nt believe my ears, as I felt that they maybe putting on a brave face I said ''Are you sure''? They were except, Pughaz who said ''yes at times when I frequented the beach with my B'ed class mates[sighted] I did feel sad that I could'nt see when they were having a merry time but I push away such thoughts immediately and try not to think about it.''

Another blind youth said ''Amongst the disabled lot we are the luckiest and those with ortho problems [those who cant walk ] are the worst .We thank god that though we cant see we are mobile and there fore independant.'' I was reminded of the proverb 'I was sorry that I didn't have shoes till I saw a man without legs'.

To me eyesight was and is the most important sense . How can one live in total darkness ?Yet these V.I youth who are sightless since childhood and have accepted it as matter of course seem to be undaunted by their disability!

Here I am who has been pitying the V.I. all my life for being deprived of the visual treats the world has to offer and there they are giving it only a passing thought and getting on with life cheerfully!


























It seems that these blind youth who are sightless since childhood have accepted their disa

1 comment:

Vidat said...

The last two lines are supposed to be deleted but escaped my notice before publication .I don't know how to delete it now, hence this clarification.
sujata